| Round: 1 | ||||
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Pick | Team | Player | POS | NFL |
| 1 | Corporate Zombies | Ray Rice | RB | BAL |
| 2 | Murderers Row | Matt Forte | RB | CHI |
| 3 | Lynch Valley Assassins | Drew Brees | QB | NO |
| 4 | College Park Headhunters | Chris Johnson | RB | TEN |
| 5 | Somali Pirates | Jamaal Charles | RB | KC |
| 6 | Dwarf Fluffer | Michael Vick | QB | PHI |
| 7 | Tuscaloosa Tallywhackers | LeSean McCoy | RB | PHI |
| 8 | Fresno Bandits | Aaron Rodgers | QB | GB |
| 9 | South Park Cows | Maurice Jones-Drew | RB | JAC |
| 10 | Smoking Guns | Adrian Peterson | RB | MIN |
| 11 | East Cobb Demons | Arian Foster | RB | HOU |
| 12 | Coney Island Whitefish | Roddy White | WR | ATL |